The abuser may give the child presents, money, alcohol or simply attention as part of the “grooming” process in order to gain the child’s trust and draw them in. Later, when the behaviour of the abuser starts to change, many children are too frightened to come forward. Violence, coercion and intimidation are often part of CSE as many perpetrators target the most vulnerable of children. This vulnerability is often due to personal or economic circumstances that leave young people with few choices.
Sometimes, children don’t realise they are being abused. This might lead them to suffer in silence for years without talking to anyone about what is happening. It can happen to both boys and girls from all backgrounds and communities.
Child sexual exploitation is NEVER the young person’s fault, even if they feel that they have ‘agreed’ to the sexual activity.
It is acknowledged that childhood sexual abuse happens a lot more frequently than people might think. A 2016 survey by the Office for National Statistics found that 7% of the population experienced sexual assault in childhood. To put this in context – less people have diabetes in the UK! Read more here.
Some survivors are well aware of the trauma they experienced in childhood. They may be troubled by memories of abuse, and they continue to live with the pain, confusion and feelings of loneliness they experienced as a child.
Other survivors may not remember that they have been abused, or they may only remember some experiences of abuse or not be sure at all. They may not understand or acknowledge that what they experienced was abuse or neglect.
It is very common for survivors to deny that an experience was abusive, or to minimise the seriousness of the abuse by thinking or saying ‘it only happened once’ or ‘it wasn’t so bad’. Many survivors live with symptoms of abuse, such as panic attacks, strange body sensations, inexplicable fears and anxiety, or aches and pains, that they are unable to explain. Their body remembers what happens to them, and they relive the emotions and feelings associated with abuse over and over again – but many survivors don’t connect these symptoms to their childhood abuse.
You may not be sure if you were sexually abused or not so we have listed some of the things that have happened to people who we’ve worked with as a guideline. Please note this is not comprehensive and if you are in any doubt about whether you were sexually abused as a child please feel free to get in touch or discuss with a healthcare professional.
